DEALING WITH A PERSON WITH DEPRESSION

DEALING WITH A PERSON WITH DEPRESSION

Dealing With a Person With Depression

Most of us have had a bout of depression. Some have deep or clinical depression. Their world is dark, hopeless, unloving, hurtful, and everything and everybody are seen in a negative light. Maybe I should say a negative darkness. Many with depression will say they feel as if a dark cloud is hanging over them or that a dark blanket envelops them when they walk away from a well lit area filled with "normal" people and into their own living space.

People who have overcome depression are more empathetic toward others, especially those who are going through a bout of depression. Sometimes just talking it out makes a big difference. People who have had situational depression or worse are better equipped to handle a future situation because they have been through a storm or storms and realize the sun will shine again. They actually become stronger.

Encourage the person with depression to pour his or her emotions into an art form such as singing, playing an instrument, writing, sculpting, etc. If the person is into sports, give it his/her all. An art form without emotions poured into it is like the difference between creative writing and a newspaper article. And playing sports half-heartedly almost guarantees a loss.

Does the person have ADHD? Persons with ADHD have excess energy and emotions and therefore when they become adults, they fit right in with the teenagers. They have the energy to lead them while the rest of us have lost energy. They have trouble focusing but when they do, they can take their thoughts to a level others don't. Having ADHD is not a bad thing, though many with ADHD get depressed until they learn to corral their emotions and behavior. Then they often excel. Encourage the person who has it to use it for the good.

Self-discipline is needed in order to be an overcomer of suicidal thoughts, depression or anxiety. "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize" I Corinthians 9:24-27, NIV. Focus on serving others and give it your all. "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might..." Eccl. 9:10a.

If you do happen to speak to someone with suicidal thoughts or comments, try to learn if they are serious, though even then a person can't be sure they are being forthright. Find out if they have a plan and if they do, how would they do it--cut their wrist, use a weapon, jump off a building, drown themselves, overdose on drugs? Has their normal behavior changed? Do they have dark circles around their eyes indicating lack of sleep or other health problems. Ask them when is the last time they slept and ate. That is important. Are they taking the medicine they have been prescribed, if any?

Keep them talking if they look like they're going to take action. Ask them who would be hurt by their actions? Ask if they have a pet. What is their favorite season? Remind them it will come around again. What sport do they like? What team? Do they like to swim? What was the funnest thing they ever did. What was their most embarrassing moment? Tell them one of yours. (For me it was waving good-bye to my boyfriend in jr. high and turning around and walking into a tree with him still watching.)

If the person has been "dumped" by a boyfriend or girlfriend, don't minimize their feelings. Sympathize with them. Memorize the following scripture verses but don't worry if you have a difficult time memorizing book, chapter and verse (like Romans 12:15). "Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh." (Luke 6:21) "Woe to you who laugh now, for you will mourn and weep." (Luke 6:25) When a person is hurting now, their emotional pain will eventually turn to joy. God will punish those who cause pain to others instead of showing love. Those who laugh at a hurting person will be brought to tears. Our charge is to "Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn" (Romans 12:15) no matter the reason.